Not Lead Jammer.

Wow, March was a long month. Our season opener feels like ages ago, and now we’re gearing up for our next home bout on April 9^th. We played a familiar foe, tough competition and a proclaimed rival. We dominated, struggled and overcame. Looking towards this next bout against the Kansas Roller Warriors: Plan B team, I feel weary and uncertain.

Episode 1, 2 and 3.

Before Back in Black, we worked hard and needed the release that a bout brings; playing other skaters and having all eyes on us, but now I’m starting to fear I blew my load as Twinkletoes in that first one. Madison brought a different surface and new opposition, so of course I wasn’t going to perform perfectly, but I felt my contribution was poorer. By the time the Dames rolled around, my body was punishing me with sickness and as I took that line for the first time, my legs shook. The first time is always nerve-wracking but I couldn’t shake it. It wasn’t a lack of confidence or decisiveness, it just felt like I had lost a bit of my GoGoGo. Like the Millennium Falcon revving up for hyperspace and failing. It didn’t help that you could just forget whatever wheels you brought to 7 Flags, because they were all equal to rocks on your feet after a layer of sugar and dirt got wrapped around them.

Exhaustion and sickness kept me from practice Sunday and last night just felt bad. It could be the snot infestation in my nose, being over-worked or just a bad attitude, but I don’t like this feeling. I’m drowning in Derbyland instead of flourishing. I look down at the wheels on my feet and wonder why the fuck I’m skating in circles. I read my blog and wonder who really cares what Small Town USA is doing. I feel like a child with power as a board memeber. I’m broke, my room is a mess and I can't do all the video endeavors I want to do. I’m unable to maintain control of my life at all times and the moment I let go, it all seems to crumble.

I know I am capable and the answers are all there, it’s just hard to see the light most of the time. It’s a bit comforting to get online and see other people living lives immersed in derby and to know I am not completely insane. It’s also inspiring to see our fresh meat doing so well, so I must be doing something right. I think Animal and I have a nice balance with coaching, but we wouldn’t be getting anywhere without their drive and great attitudes.

Fresh meat: doing laps, being amazing.

They’re scrimmaging now. It’s like we’ve dropped them off at college. They’re out on their own and they still have a lot to learn, but they’re growing up so fast. Most of their progression will come from experience and trying new things, but we're still here to give them a little guidance. They’re improving so quickly, which also means that I need to be constantly working harder. There will always be skaters better than me as well as new skaters with the potential to surpass me. 

I have a week to get out of my head and back in my feet. It’s going to be a long season so I need to pace myself instead of sprinting to the end. It’s time to clear my head of this funk and work on my health, my life and my derby. I am in charge of my own destiny and dwelling in my failures isn’t going to get me anywhere. Neither is writing depressing blog posts, so now that this is out of my system, I will see you on the track.  

Highlights from Back in Black, one thing I feel accomplished about. 

 

March 26th vs Des Moines Derby Dames:
Emily Sherman Photography 1, 2, 3.
Cathy Kovach  Photography
Dave Schrader 
Joy Doehrmann
D3 Hightlights
D3 Recap
D3' Maharry Photography 

L4D Highlight

Some of my fancy footwork from the March 12th bout against the Quad City Rollers...



-L4D

Left 4 Deadwards as Twinkletoes.

Jr High track - "chicken legs," not CRZY LEGS.

So they say hard work pays off. Practice makes perfect. If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. You can do anything you put your mind to… They all kind of sound like bullshit phrases that hang on a wall in a high school gym teacher’s office. At that age, I hated school but did love to play sports. I was the girl who sweated in gym class and wanted to play football with the boys. I played softball and basketball and even tried track for awhile and was pretty decent all around. I had the competitive edge that pushed me just enough to try, but not enough passion to try, try again.

At a certain point I was no longer the tall third grader who could rebound or the long legged first baseman who could reach for the ball. My peers started to surpass me and get better and I didn’t care enough to work any harder. By the time I graduated, I had quit the sports I played almost all my life.

Last Saturday I felt what it was like to really excel at what I do. I’ve been playing roller derby for over two years now and I’m feeling myself improve; the things I had been practicing over and over were starting to come natural. And it’s not just me. On the track I saw cohesion and smart derby from our team. Nothing has really changed about the way we train; we’ve just gotten better at the things we’ve been practicing, together. The best thing any team can do, is practice with each other often, and our emphasis on attendance is definitely paying off.

Swiss MisFit's debut bout.
Photo by Patrick Bloom

We began our second full bouting season with a strong victory against the Quad City Rollers, 191 to 83. It was kind of nice to be playing a familiar face in our season opener since we’re playing a lot of new teams this year.  We started the bout strong by controlling the pack with solid walls and lead jammer status, to hold QCR scoreless until about the sixth jam. As a team, our goal going into this bout was better communication and focus, and to work together. In roller derby, offense and defense is played at the same time, so you have to be ready to switch tactics quickly and fluidly depending on which jammer is in the pack. These tactics change immensely when one of the jammers is not even on the track. With our jammer in the box, we sped it up, and with theirs off the track we trapped a skater to slow it to a near standstill.

DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!
Emily Sherman Photography

One of my own personal jammer goals was to work harder at taking the inside, instead of defaulting to the outside. The inside line is often the most heavily guarded so a jammer may be tempted to just take the outside, but that is most tantalizing for heavy hitters. To counteract that, I like to employ the move taught by Suzy Hotrod as “DON’T FUCKING TOUCH ME!”

In normal skating posture, I am low and my hitting zones are forward. The blocker will lock onto this and make a cut out to hit. This is when I suddenly straighten up and go the other direction. Their committed momentum takes them flying off the track as I am slipping through the inside. I managed to use DFTM *3* times in a row against an admittedly beautiful waterfall by the QCR pack, thus Your Mom renaming me “Twinkletoes”

I also focused on my GOGOGO skills. As a jammer, I have two minutes or less to get around as many times as I can to score points. When DFTM fails and I do get knocked out or down, those few seconds of recovery time really count. I can’t waste time waiting for the pack or a blocker to move forward so I can re-enter behind them. If I can get back in play as quick as possible, they are often still recovering from the block they just gave, giving me time to speed around them before they can re-adjust their stance.

Sneaking through the inside to try and snag some points on the fourth whistle.
Cathy Kovach Photography

Looking back now, the bout was such a blur. I remember some of these small accomplishments but as a whole I couldn’t tell you how well I did. Now that we’re an apprentice league we have to keep in-depth stats like the WFTDA teams do. It is insane. I can tell you that I jammed 11 times and only blocked in 3. I scored 55 points and got lead jammer 7 times. I sat in the box for one major backblock (which I remember doing specifically, oops) and 3 minors: cutting the track, out of bounds blocking, and out of bounds skating.  Then there are fifty other columns that I don’t understand, but my love for lists finds this all very helpful. All these numbers are made possible by the WONDERFUL volunteers who help run the bout. All the people you see holding timers or clipboards are non-skating officials (NSOs) and are invaluable to each of our bouts.

We also had an army of fresh meat to
help at the bout.
Emily Sherman Photography

Coming out of that bout I feel very confident and excited looking into the next two weekends. Saturday we play one of the Mad Rollin’ Dolls' home teams, the Unholy Rollers. They are current league champions and have some skaters who play actual WFTDA bouts; it’s daunting to the say the least. I’ve made myself OK with the fact that we might lose, but it will be worth it for the great experience of playing a team that has been around much longer than we have. Despite all that, I feel we are going to surprise them and possibly squeak out a victory?

The following weekend, we head to Des Moines to play the Dames to further our so called "rivalry". I watched their season opener last month, and they are looking pretty strong. MOAB is laying out some killer hits and Cosmo is really pushing it as a jammer. There is of course the always popular Stella Italiana, but we will also be bringing the infamous Kraken. I’m hoping the bout will be more than all the hype, because I’m ready for some hardcore, intense, bad ass roller derby this season, so everybody better BRING IT! 

-L4D aka Twinkletoes

Check out pictures from this bout:
Emily Sherman Photography Album 1, Album 2.
KORfan
Cathy Kovach Photography
Jeff Hicock (QCR photog)
Erik Roys Photography
Patrick Bloom
Tracy Pierce

Back in Black: An Audience Perspective

Deadwards vs Gotcha

The Back in Black bout saw the return of the Old Capitol City Roller Girls to the Marriott to begin their third season with their first bout against some familiar opponents in the Quad City Rollers. The track and bench arrangement had changed from last year with the first straightaway and benches along the outside wall. Scoreboard projection was one the wall behind turn 1 and the sound board off turn 4. The audience showed up reasonably early and additional chairs were obtained to accommodate the growing crowd. Announcers E-rock and Your Dad covered the action while KRNA's Shark provided music.

The OCCRG were wearing their home black uniforms and the QCR were in red. The usual suspects were wearing zebra stripes (except for Lukan D'Otha Way, who was still mending a broken ankle) with Body Bag from EIO serving as head referee. The OCCRG had were playing their veteran jammer crew, splitting the duty between GLADi8HER, Ophelia Fracture, and Left 4 Deadwards, although half their bench wore the star including Animal Mother and Gigahurtz. The Quad City Rollers leaned heavily on Lady Gotcha and Pink Taco as jammers, with Sugar N' Slice wearing the star about one jam in six and a few other skaters taking a turn. I should point out that my writeups are deeply flawed in that I only mention jammers; the blockers are doing most of the work but I'm overwhelmed between taking notes and photos (I averaged 1 photo every 5 seconds of play), so I can only keep track of jammers. Blockers, you're awesome, and I acknowledge that I'm not giving you your due.


The first jam began the bout with Ophelia Fracture facing off against Sugar N' Slice. Ophelia Fracture gained lead jammer status as the OCCRG blockers made life hard for Sugar N' Slice, allowing OFX to score a grand slam and shut down QCR to post a score of 9-0. Jam 2 saw the renewal of the rivalry between Left 4 Deadwards and Lady Gotcha with some jammer-on-jammer action before reaching the pack, and Deadwards hit her 4 points and quit it. GLADi8HER got the L over Pink Taco in the third jam but called it before any points were scored. Play continued with the ladies in black claiming lead jammer (including a grand slam by Left 4 Deadwards) so the OCCRG blockers were earning their pay (err, beer?) through the sixth jam when I think I saw Jane Bang take the Lap of Shame for missing the penalty box and Lady Gotcha finally got the QCR on the board to make the score 30-2. Jam seven saw Pink Taco take the (non-Soviet) red star to the penalty box and Fracture racked up another 9 to expand the OCCRG lead to 39-8. Things got grim for the QCR in jam 9 when Mexican Monster took their star to the sin bin again and GLADi8HER scored 24 to do the Rasputin treatment on last year's post-injury retirement rumors, cranking the score up to 72-8. Jam 11 saw Pink Taco finally gain lead jammer status for the Quad City Rollers although GLADi8HER was able to snatch 3 more points to make it 85-8. The Quad City defense started to gel and three jams later it was 94-15 even though (according to my notes) they skated jam 14 short one blocker. Jam 15 had Triple D Zaster coming out with a positive point differential against Lady Gotcha although Ophelia Fracture took the long extra lap after entering the penalty box incorrectly (and sliding the seats about two feet).

Gigahurtz takes lead.

Jam 16 saw Zom B Blokr serving as jammer for the OCCRG against the aptly named Banzai Bombshell, but the undead representative slipped before reaching the pack and earned a low block major so she headed off to the box. A minute later she came out, earned lead jammer, and another trip to the box at the end of the jam. Lady Gotcha came out and scored her 5 in the next jam to make it 103-28. The towering Gigahurtz nabbed lead jammer in jam 18 over Pink Taco, but had to call it off before any points were scored. Triple D Zaster and Lady Gotcha showed us some jammer-on-jammer action in jam 19 but the score remained unchanged even though Gotcha was lead jammer. Triple D came back to face Pink Taco but ended up in the box and Taco scored 5 to take us into the half 103-33 for OCCRG.

Half time gave us the charity presentation to The Arc of Southeast Iowa, refills at the concession stand, and a pleasant encounter with the ever-glamorous Glitter Mafia and the loquacious Yale Cohn of PATV's Talking With. The photographers relocated, the fans stretched their legs, the skaters had their pep talks and we were ready for skating to resume.

The ladies in red came out and earned lead jammer status the first three chances in the second period although the score didn't change much, with the third jam ending at 104-35 and Gigahurtz taking the star to the box for the OCCRG. An official time out ensued, but after play resumed Lady Gotcha got the QCR a fourth lead jammer status in a row. The 4-town blockers knelt to prevent the slow start although they did it after the start whistle so they may have gotten a few tick marks on the wrong board while Gotcha brought 9 points home. Pink Taco jammed against Ophelia Fracture in the fifth go of the period, but confusion reigned when they both ended up in the penalty box after Fracture lost her jammer helmet cover. A long official time out ensued (with the announcers speculating on bicep cramps in the jam timer's arms) and play resumed with the score 108-48 and the pack showing two blockers for each team. GLADi8HER raced against Lady Gotcha to snag lead jammer status in spite of the Iowa City penalty box overflowing and the score ratcheted up to 115-55. We were treated to another of the foreshadowed official timeouts, and then Deadwards eventually grabbed lead jammer status over Pink Taco although Taco racked up two points to leave it 115-57. Fracture came out and traded penalties with Lady Gotcha in jam 8, and ended the jam with another trip to the box after Gotcha earned 8 to make it 116-65.

Ho and Trip with the two wall.

An official timeout gave the fans a chance to snag more snacks and visit the merchandise tables, and then the action resumed. Pink Taco grabbed lead jammer status while Fracture cooled her skates in the box and the QCR pack knelt to prevent the Denver-style stall at the whistle. GLADi8HER squashed any hopes of a QCR rally when she scored 19 in jam 10 after Lady Gotcha's penalty to make the score 136-70. Left 4 Deadwards came out to follow up with lead jammer status and another 6 points against Sugar N' Slice. Fearing some sort of undead revival on the Quad City's part, GLAD came out and tallied up twenty-three points in an awesome display of jammer chutzpah that saw her waving goodbye as she passed the pack while Pink Taco sat in the penalty box, and the score was 165 -70. We endured a long official time out, and then a line formed at the concession stand when Quad City called a time out.

Someone poked me and I woke up to see Lady Gotcha grab lead jammer against Deadwards as play resumed in jam 14, although not much scoring followed. Triple D Zaster came out to grab lead jammer over Pink Taco in jam 14 and black outscored red 8-2 to fix the lead at the century mark 174-74. Left 4 Deadwards racked up another 15 points with a slow pack and Lady Gotcha's trip to the box but got nailed for a back block at the end of jam 15 with the score 191-77. Pink Taco got lead jammer in jam 16 but could only score 3 in spite of blocker Gigahurtz joining L4D in the penalty box. Zom B Blokr bore the star for the OCCRG and gave us some jammer v. jammer action against Lady Gotcha in jam 17 but Lady G got the lead and three points. Zom B stuck it out into jam 18 and scored the lead over Pink Taco but called the jam before any points were scored to end the bout with a victory for the Old Capitol City Roller Girls 191 - 83.

The first half saw the OCCRG dominating, earning lead jammer 12 times to QCR's 5, include a stunning streak of 10 at the start of the period. The second period saw a more even balance of 8 to 9 leads, and a correspondingly better showing on the scoreboard for Quad Cities. Jammer penalties were about even, OCCRG 3 to QCR 2 in the first period and 5 each in the second. If the Quad City Rollers could have prevented four big jams (24, 23, 19, and 15 points) this would have been a close bout. No one got ejected although a few skaters accumulated five or more turns in the box.

Photos & Words by KORfan. 

The Derby Monster Ate My Life

Derby has been consuming so much of my life lately I’m not sure there’s a non-derby bone left in my body. The team is my full time, non-paying job. The fresh meat are my children, the vets are my needy girlfriends; it’s an interesting family. If I’m not busy worrying about my PR committee, I’m going to a board meeting, a roster meeting, or sitting down to create practices with Animal. I’m making contacts for events, printing flyers, hanging flyers, creating, designing, planning, thinking, stressing over everything. I go through brief moments of defeat and want to give it all up, and other moments of complete and utter derby love.

I got thinking recently when a non-derby friend asked if I ever had time for other things. My mind kind of went blank as I tried to think of what these “other things” might be. So I hypothetically removed derby from my life and tried to imagine what would be left. There wasn’t much, and it made me a little concerned. Everyone I spend time with is in derby or related to derby. I’m constantly making failed promises to hang out with non-derby friends and slowly diverting from anything else I used to do. As for my plan to either take more classes or find a better paying job… well I suppose that’s been on hold for a while. I have two part time jobs and I’m continually floundering. My brain is constantly in the here and now and what needs done this week, and never in the long term life-goals mindset.

I know a lot of this over thinking is just pre-season stress, because all work and no play makes Deadwards a frustrated girl. It is bout week, with our season opener this Saturday, so I have 50 zillion things to do and the bout will be my reward. I look forward to that and then realize that there’s five more home bouts and lots of things I want to see the team accomplish this year, so there really won’t be much more time for me to breathe. Especially since we’re kicking off our season with 3 bouts in a row; 1 home and 2 away. (Quad Cities 3/12, Unholy Rollers of the Mad Rollin Dolls 3/19 and Des Moines Derby Dames 3/26.)

Bout day will come and the whole league will be at the Marriott for a majority of the day, setting up, getting ready, and warming up. Then the doors will open and I will mentally deal with the fact that the Marriott is or is not full of people. It feels like a test for me and the PR committee, to see if we’ve been doing enough and if our efforts will pay off.  Then it’s time to skate. Intros can be kind of horrifying. Everyone’s eyes are only on you for one lap, and after I nearly tripped coming out of the curtain at Full Metal Derby last year, I get overly anxious. Next, the bout begins. If I’m jamming first, my nerves are tingling and my stomach is in knots. This first jam sets the bout, the team’s mood, and my performance. After that, it all just happens… until the last jam.

More times than not, I tend to be the jammer in the final few minutes of a bout. In our first ever bout against the Quad Cities in June of ’09, I huffed and puffed my way through the pack, but couldn’t manage to snag a few more points. Everyone thought we won, but the scoreboard updated and we ended up losing by three. Despite the loss, this was our first bout and I was wearing a fucking tutu (never again); it was pretty impressive.

This past June however, we had quite the lead on the Stateline Derby Divas and managed to jam every single person on the bench. Bang couldn’t stay out of the box as jammer, so with a few nods and a pivot panty on my head, the plan to pass the star was set. I toed the line and after a lap or two, Bang entered with the star and handed it off to me. I threw it on and before anyone knew what happened, I was coming around to score. It was fun to actually pull off a not often used strategy in a bout.

The next bout was in Des Moines, versus MIR; the one that still has a tender spot in my derby heart. I had been jamming a majority of the night and was all out exhausted. It was nearing the end and I told Tynamite that I couldn’t jam anymore, only block. After a few jams, it was down to the wire and I took the jam line anyway. This was it. I believe we had a small lead so all I had to do was get through first and call it off. I was nearly through and instead I got called off. I sat in the box and cried as we lost the bout.

Following that was an intense bout against the LaCrosse Skating Sirens. The score was pretty close the whole bout and we were down by a handful of points when I was on the jam line in the final minutes. There was some confusing between the refs and the benches and suddenly the jam was starting. Half the Sirens weren’t present in the pack and as they tried to take the line they were waved off for not being ready at the start of the jam. After the initial pass their jammer and a blocker visited the box which left one Siren on the track against me and two blockers. I skated until I was certain we had the lead and called it off. We won, but due to confusing and error, it didn’t feel well deserved.

To say the least, I’m a little nervous about Saturday. Not only will I be participating in a sport, I am helping cultivate a business. I want us as a team perform well, and as a league be successful. I also hope with each bout, we are reaching a little further and getting more and more people interested in this dynamic sport that I feel so passionate about. Roller derby doesn’t bring us fame or fortune. We don’t get scholarships or professional drafts or loads of money; the pay off is an intangible thing. I have instead earned a confidence, a family and a hunger for more. I just hope all my friends outside of Derbyland understand if I don’t ever come back.

-L4D

Ace of Skates

If anyone has followed my blog long enough, my very first entry was recapping a mixer I participated in last year put on by the Quad City Rollers, and last Saturday they put it on again for the third year in a row. For those who don’t know, a mixer is hosted by a team (QCR) who invites skaters from multiple leagues (Old Capitol City Roller Girls, Des Moines Derby Dames, Eastern Iowa Outlaws, Circle City Derby Girls, Mad Rollin’ Dolls, Chicago Outfit, Rockford Rage, Stateline Derby Divas) and then mixes them up into new teams and has them bout in a shortened tournament style event. This year it was dubbed the Ace of Skates and the teams were the Bleeding Hearts (red), the Spiteful Spades (white), the Diamond Destroyers (green), and the Killer Clubs (black). The first two bouts were 20 minutes each, followed by a semi final bout that was 30 minutes long and a championship bout that was two 20 minute periods.

OCCRG's GLADi8HER on the jam line vs Sal Paralyze
from EIO. Standard impatient jammer pose.

In the first bout the Diamond Destroyers took on the Killer Clubs in what seemed like a pretty good match up. On the jam line first was OCCRG’s own GLADi8HER (Diamonds) and Ophelia Fracture (Clubs) who both got through multiple times during the full two minute jam, but Ophelia pushed the Clubs slightly further ahead. Sal Paralyze helped maintain this lead for awhile, but their walls quickly started to crumble as Glad, Lady Gotcha and Malice Munro rallied the Diamonds into a comfortable lead. 20 minutes went by quick, and as I was lining up for the second bout, I returned in time to see Glad break her toe stop off (for the second year in a row at this mixer) and skate about three or four grandslams with the damaged skate planted for fear of tripping without the usual support under her toe. It was quite the image to see her pushing along like she was on a skateboard, toe stop in hand, showing that derby girls don’t quit. Diamonds won 87 to 51.

Bloody Elle is a relentless force.

My team, the Spiteful Spades were up next against the Bleeding Hearts, who I so lovingly call Team Douchebag. I’m not quite sure what the logic behind choosing teams for mixers is, but Team Douchebag was quite obviously stacked with some of the best skaters from the area. They had the quick feet of Pink Taco and Stella Italiana combined with the blocking force of Bat R Up, Jen Detta, Animal Mother, Dead Lee Danni, Bloody Elle, QC Banshee and more. We had two skaters from our roster drop out which put our alternate in, Sugar and Slice, but she has been recovering from a sore knee and her jamming was kept minimal.

Crazy Legs vs the Kraken. Legs win.

Seeing what we were up against, our only point of strategy was to try and play together as well as we could. Teamwork is the challenge of a mixer because you are playing with skaters of various skill levels and experience, which reminds you how important it is when you’re skating with your own league. I found that I often ended up at the back, blocking alone and would turn into one of my own players as I watched Stella fly around the outside. The Douchebags worked together a little better than I anticipated as they totally shut us down by trapping a skater from our team when our jammer was in the box. It was frustrating so I tried to do my best while jamming which usually meant getting lead and calling it off before they could score more points. Graves tried to score more for us as well, but she was spending too much time in the box. A Few Screws Lucy, with her sparkly leg warmers, reluctantly took the jamline and gave it all she had, but we just could not keep it together against such a heavy hitting team. I should note however, once while I was jamming, Bat R Up tried her best to take me out, but I threw my hip back at her and she ate my dust as I sped away from the pack. It’s the small victories that you have to be proud of.

After losing 71 to 20, we went on to the semifinal for our 30 minute bout against the Killer Clubs. I was glad we were playing right away since I was still pumped up and looking to skate harder and faster. I felt we would have had more of a chance against them, but instead we decided to play a lovely game of musical chairs in the penalty box, which I somehow stayed out of all night. Mixers result in a little bit messier play since the skaters are out of their element, so there were lots of pile ups and accidental tripping. It’s just not as pretty. I don’t remember much from this bout as we quickly slid into a funk and lost 139 to 35.

Few Screws Lucy vs the world. The rest of white in the box, but she still knocks Ophelia out on her own.

That left the final bout, Team Douchebag versus the Diamond Destroyers. I spent most of this bout booing and explaining things to our fresh meat, so I didn’t pay attention to much of the action. The Diamonds gave it all they had but the Douchebags undoubtedly smashed their way to the top, 149 to 59.

It was a frustrating experience, but by the end of the night I had met interesting skaters and had people I didn’t know telling me I was awesome. The after party was a blast, and some of our fresh meat even joined us on the dance floor, proving they were real OCCRGs. Derby, dancing, and pizza; what more could you ask for?
-L4D

Pictures by Joy Doehrmann.

Frenemies 'til the End.

Ophelia Fracture and Sugar & Slice lineup.

I think at the beginning of Monster’s Brawl last Saturday, we were still riding our high from beating the Cedar Rapids Rollergirls the week prior. We were entering the track with the Quad City Rollers, a team we had played four times previously, skating away with three wins, so we walked into this one pretty confident. Speaking for myself, my head wasn’t in the game right away from the first whistle and I’m not quite sure why. I started in the second lineup jamming against Lady Gotcha and we were being chatty on the line until the whistle. Maybe we have just gotten too comfortable with our QC friends so our mental game wasn’t quite there at the beginning. Whatever it was, I sat down after the first jam feeling shaken and unsure.

A few jams later, and after the first of many official time outs, our score went down a few points and we watched the score climb for the QC Rollers, putting them in the lead. The next few jams went on like this, a little scattered on our part, and they kept control of the pack by getting lead jammer repeatedly. Recently I’ve realized the importance of the first pass, and strategizing within the pack to get your jammer through first. Once your jammer has lead, the pack can focus more on the opposing jammer and if yours is in trouble, she can just call it off.

About half way through the first half, I think we finally got our minds reset on the strategy and skills that we had practiced all month. The numerous time outs probably allowed for our brains to relax and finally sync up with each other. Since the bout was so messy, penalties were being called left and right, some of which were contested or required further discussion amongst the refs. We had done a good job of staying out of the box in Cedar Rapids, but it was not the case this time.

Animal Mother and Triple D. Zaster hold the jammer at the front as Bat R Up helps GLADi8HER through the pack.

In the last eight minutes of the first half we gained control of the pack and began working together more fluidly. I think the greatest accomplishment we have achieved out of our second season is our teamwork on the track. The most beneficial thing a team can do for itself is practice together and often. The more intimately you know everyone’s skating style, voice, derby stank and ability, the more your game comes second nature during a bout.

At half time we were feeling the surge of our comeback, but were still keeping our heads on and discussed what we could do better. It had become quite chaotic, but we knew we just had to keep our minds focused and not let certain ref calls or penalties on the track get to us. We like to pride ourselves on being an even-tempered team, so the all we could do was continue to play our best and fair game.

Captains Sugar and Animal talk to head ref D'shiz.

With the score at 105 to 51, we had pushed ahead into a comfortable lead, yet the bout was still leaving a sour taste in my mouth. The mood of the whole thing was weird and there were lots of timeouts and penalties that were just upsetting the flow of the bout. The excitement that roller derby gets from a crowd is the fast paced action, not the zebra huddle. (Although that does add breaks for dancing on the line.) I have to say Animal Mother deserves a pat on the back for all her work as an Alternate Captain for this bout. If a team has any qualms with a certain call or any general concerns, the Captain and Alternate Captains are the only ones who may address the refs. Bat R Up was often in the box for official reviews, requiring Animal to be assertive and decisive in between jams.

The second half began, and it was immediately evident that black was back, and dominating in the pack. I think we all saw Gigahurtz (who arrived bout day as an alternate and got put in last minute) kick in to gear with some explosive hits and smart skating in the pack. Zom B Blokr brought all our strategy practice to fruition by taking directing the control of the pack for a whole jam as she managed to put nearly all the QC blockers in the penalty box and stopped the pack to a crawl for a successful power jam. I also saw Benzo Bang execute two amazing hits in a row, rivaling the impact Bat R Up leaves on the memories of most skaters. I could care less when I was on the bench because watching the beautiful teamwork of my fellow skaters on the track left me ecstatic.

As we got deeper in the second half and our score began to jump, I could feel the skating on the track become a bit scrambled. QC was giving everything that had to try and rein us in, but we still kept our control and didn’t let up. I have to say, it wasn’t quite the bout I was expecting to wrap up the year with, as three of the Quad City girls and one of our own did not get to see the end of the bout due to ejection. In the recent version of the WFTDA rules, penalties carry over the half and you are only allowed seven total, whereas before you could receive five major penalties per period for a total of ten. After receiving your seventh penalty the head ref will ask that you leave the track and return to the locker room. That, along with gross misconduct ejects a player from the bout in order to keep the skating fair and safe. If you are coming to bouts expecting an all out brawl, you are mistaken; trips to the box, egregious acts and fighting is not tolerated.

Gigahurtz guards the line as Bat R Up takes out Sugar & Slice.

With three of Quad City’s heavy hitters gone, their pack was left weakened and their jammers tired. Our pack control and smart skating finished the bout 225-104. We may not have ended the year “undefeated,” but a 9-2 record for our second season is definitely something to write home about. Besides any numbers or stats, just watching us play is evidence enough of our progress as a team. My concept of roller derby and how the game is played has broadened extensively, enhancing my skill level all around. Seeing some of our fresher skaters finally click and become vital assets to the team is reassuring that we’re doing something right. It’s obvious that from here we have the potential to get even better as our team expands with recruitment and move forward with our apprenticeship.

-L4D

Skating History

Us as babies.

There are some internet how-to guides and discussion forums that may answer some questions that new roller derby teams have, but there’s no mainstream precedent for derby teams to model themselves after. Growing up, everyone has some inkling of how basketball is played, or has seen a football game without really trying. All these “whatever”ball sports pervade almost every American home and are as basic as apple pie. When it comes to roller derby, either no one has ever heard of it, or it is that thing they watched on TV when they were younger. (Or my favorite: “Oh, like the movie Whip It!?”) You have to search pretty hard for any sort of guide to running a derby team, and after that add a bunch of blood, sweat, and maybe a few broken bones before you really get what it is all about.

Fonda Cuffs and myself smooshing Sugar N Slice.

This Saturday is the second annual Monster’s Brawl, marking the one year anniversary of our first home bout. Thinking back to our first year as a team we had to learn quite a bit on the fly as we figured out what works and what fails miserably as an organized group of women. Whether we bickered about uniforms, searched for a bouting and practice place to call our home, or figured out the best way to organize the business structure of our team, it all took compromise, trial and error, patience, hard work and ultimately just lots of experience.

I hadn’t really realized how far we had come, until Animal Mother, GLADi8HER and I traveled 3 ½ hours to Humboldt, Iowa to practice with a brand new team that calls themselves the Dakota City Demolition Crew. (Dakota City being where their home rink is.) Their leader, Siren, had pervious derby experience and ran her team through some familiar drills. There were about eight girls skating that night and we were told about a total of twelve who come regularly after six weeks of practice. Most of them were fairly steady on their skates, but it was evident they hadn’t looked at the rules, or knew much of how it was played. That didn’t look like it was going to stop them though; their excitement and audacity seemed like it would be enough fuel for awhile.

Hanging with the Humboldt girls, and Kip!

Derby in Iowa as a whole this last year shows that where there’s a will there’s a way. The Des Moines Derby Dames formed a little over a year ago and began bouting in the spring with a fairly full first season. I thought it was too soon for them, but about 6 months later they’re sharing a short list of WFTDA apprentice leagues with the four year-old Mid Iowa Rollers and OCCRG in our second year. Also rapidly progressing since my last blog assessment of the Iowa roller derby scene are the Eastern Iowa Outlaws, Mahaksa Mayhem and the Cedar Valley Derby Divas.

One of the best parts of roller derby is that not only do you now share your life with everyone in your league, but you enter the greater roller derby community. Thriving in its DIY spirit, you begin making connections with teams and skaters all over the country or even the world. No matter who you are or what your background is, you find a common bond with women and men all over the world who are passionate about the sport. It becomes a culture you read about, you skate against, and you just can’t get enough of. Finding these new teams on their freshly created fanpages, you see the faces of all types of women in gym shorts and t-shirts. As time goes on, you see them grow through your facebook feed as you place derby names with faces, and they start adapting their practice wardrobe to these new confident, sexy identities.

The hardest part is getting this tight knit community to infiltrate the masses. As much as we would all love to just play derby for derby’s sake, we require an audience to feed us.  I see it growing online and in these small town Iowa teams, but people who are outsiders to derby don’t get it unless someone invites them in or they stumble head on into it. I figured in our small-ish college town the word of derby would spread like wildfire, but reaching the student population is our toughest market yet.

Uproar on the Lakeshore. Nov 5-7

Next week I will travel to Chicago to witness some of the top teams in North America at WFTDA Championships. It will be exciting to see and meet so many people who love derby as much as I do. I will see athletes that I have only read about and teams I have only seen boutcasts of. The magical thing is that these superstars are just like you or me; anyone can push themselves to the same level without a multi-million dollar contract or strict athletic standards. The only stipulation is that you have to get the sweaty before you get the shiny.

Roller derby is cementing itself in society as a full-fledged sport now, and has obviously become more than a passing fad as it had in the past. Even though this reincarnated version of derby has been around for nearly a decade, it is still in its infancy. Every girl who straps on a pair of skates, every team that pushes themselves harder, and every online forum abuzz about roller derby is helping cultivate the future of the sport itself. We are the living, breathing, skating history of derby.

-L4D

Let's do the time warp again?

Rants. Raves. And a few other things.

Ok, decided I'm not liking the video blogging so much because it basically turns into me whining about something. I will perhaps do more of that in the future, but in a different way (video bloggin.. not whining).

A week ago, some of us OCCRG girls traveled to the Quad Cities to watch them play the Paper Valley Flying Squirrels (PVRG). As an avid reader may recall, the Squirrels beat us (pretty well), and we beat QC (..decently) therefore, I think everyone expected QCR to take a beating from the Squirrels (which they had already received once when they visited PVRG a month or so ago.) But that was quite the contrary..

I had arrived a little late, about a quarter into the bout, and glanced at the score board which was only like, 35 to 16 (or something like that). It wasn't until someone pointed out that PVRG was losing that I realized what I had walked in on. (I think I was also very distracted by the guy who made a giant Pink Taco hat. Hilarious) I could already tell this was going to be an awesome bout, because it had been such a low scoring match so far, and QCR was holding their lead.

A quick scan of each team, I noticed PVRG were down a couple blockers from when they played us, and up a few that I remembered from our visit to them last December. QCR's lineups still confuses me because of their recent wave of new skaters to their roster which they seem to be keeping locked in. Since they've been keeping such a regular roster this season they have been working really well with each other, thus the amazing walls and blocking I was seeing that night. QCR was hitting right off the line, and often throughout jams. Pink Taco seemed to be blocking more than jamming, which was quite the switch off, and Lady Gotcha and Nancy Screw were jamming up a storm.

I could SEE the anxiety in the PVRG team. Their jammers seemed be scrambling for every point, often employing the 'hit it and quit it' method. (Hitting the pack, getting their four points and calling it off.) This made me laugh a little, because since I've been working so closely with the footage of our bout vs them, I noticed how almost bored their jammers had looked.. probably because they slid through our pack with ease. (since half of it was in the penalty box at any given time..)

By half time the score was a mere 51-35, QCR in the lead.

It was also at this time that 'parkles was kidnapped and was not seen until the next day. Trust no one.

The second half was quite the nail biter. You could tell the tension was getting to each team because there was some ...shall we say, catty attitudes between the teams. There is often taunting in roller derby, but sometimes you can't tell if someone will go overboard with it and take action on their frustration. It was kept to a minimum and the derby action continued. Soon it was tied at 60 with twenty minutes left in the bout. Hit it and quit it was working for PVRG in gaining some points, but QCR was not letting up. The score stayed tight for another 10 minutes and then QCR pulled into a ten point lead, 74-64.

With 3 minutes left it was a close bout at 105-94. At this point I wasn't completely sure QCR had won it. Even though there was so little time, and QCR still had a ten point lead, single jam's can decide the fate of a game. A jammer could be called to the box leaving no scoring possibilities, or good strategy can fit two jams into this time. It's also not impossible for 10-20 points in a single jam. Never underestimate roller derby.

With the crowd on their feet, and emotions flowing, QCR sealed it at 105-94. (Sorry, I feel like I should have had a more exciting description of the last jam, but I put off writing up this bout coverage, and obviously I got more into the bout at the end because my notes became lacking.)

It was nice to see a bout that I could just relax and watch...but still take part in after party festivities. Hanging out with the Quad City girls (and boys) is always a good time... Despite the awful acoustic guy they always have at the bar afterwards.. Don't they realize derby girls just want to dance??

The past few weeks with editing has been tough, exhausting, and frustrating.. but I'm getting good progress and i'm getting super excited for the screening.. which will be May 7th. (the night before our home bout.. teehee). There is actually hype growing over it, mostly from derby girls heh, but people who won't be able to make it have requested that they still want to see it.. which has me toying with the idea of a screening tour, visiting different derby leagues, showing the movie and hanging out. I'll be graduated soon and don't really know what my future holds, but that sounds like something I definitely want to do..

Another thing that has been keeping me busy is orchestrating the next home bout which is being sponsored by the Avoid the Stork campaign. Kelly, a girl I work with at the coffee shop works for them, so in talking to her we decided they need to sponsor a bout for us. and ta-da! "Rather Get Knocked Down than Knocked Up" will be May 8th. I'm super excited, and they have been amazing to work with. It should be a fantastic bout.

-L4Deadkins

Tenderized Meat

Going through footage for my BFA project, I become more and more impressed with the group of girls I skate with. Our numbers are growing so large we will have to break into multiple teams under the league name of OCCRG, according to WFTDA standards, our ultimate goal. (There can only be 20 players to a team.)

I'm impressed with the teams in the area in general, and the progression of roller derby as a sport. My quick assessment of it in Iowa, is that there are eight teams beginning in the past four years: MIR April 2006, QCR 2006, MRN multiple incarnations since.. ?, SCRD Feb 2008, CRRG Feb 2008, OCCRG Oct 2008, D3 June 2009, and the Eastern Iowa Outlaws are just forming their team this year.


I feel like within the context of these teams, the timeline of events and each enjoying their own variations of success, we have progressed so rapidly and reached this level of athleticism and organization within a year and half... it's impressive. I attend practices with faces I don't know now, when I used to know the faces..and sweat of each of my teammates intimately. We've gone from filling a rec center gym, to scrambling for seats in the Marriott Convention Center. It's exciting, scary and amazing all at the same time. I'll be graduating soon with no real direction professionally, but it feels good to have this thing in my life that I am so proud of, so sure of, so happy to be a part of.

With that said, we played the Des Moines Derby Dames last weekend in their debut on the flat track. I was a bit wary of them bouting so soon, but I have to say, I'm quite impressed. I can tell they're a determined, eager team that will be a strong and intimidating competition in no time.

Also debuting last weekend were Old Yeller and Chemical Spill from our team, playing their first bout. Our fresh meat have been working hard on the track and off the track. I feel confident walking into the convention center on bout day because we have a strong organizational support staff of non-bouters holding down the fort.

Like I've said before, there's much more to roller derby than just the action, it takes way more people to put on a successful bout. Announcers, sound mixers, multiple people for stats inside the track and outside the track, scorers, multiple refs, merch ladies, people controlling the door, bout mistresses, security, EMTs, the staff at the Marriott, extra hands to set up, bout coverage, half time entertainment, .... all volunteer.

Not to mention, none of this would be possible without our fans. Our success can only progress with an audience who is as eager about the sport as we are. So please encourage anyone and everyone who has never seen a bout before to come check it out.. or even join. We love your support already this season.


-Deadykins

pssst. next bout, May 8th vs Cedar Rapids Roller Girls..

Seeing Red.

Bat'r had a dream. In that dream she saw a wall of red in the front, red on the line and red all over their jammer. On Friday that dream came true. We played the Quad City Rollers in Davenport, IA and it was the best game of derby we have played to date. We worked together, we built walls, and kept the penalties to a minimum. We even had two fresh meat play their first bout and they played beautifully. (Unfortunately they played at the expense of injuries.)

 Wall of red in the front.. (note freshie Fanny holding the line like a champ)

 Red on the line. (freshie psycHO in the plaid skirt)

Red all over their jammer.

  
I could not be more proud of my ladies. Last year in June we played Quad Cities in our first ever bout. That time we lost, but it was a close game. (we actually thought we won at  first... but all the points hadn't been put up yet.) Last October they came to our turf to play our first home bout ever, and we were victorious. It's exciting to see such wonderful progress in your own team, in less than a year.

Dog piles then and now..

The Quad City girls have been amazing as well. This was our third bout against them in what was called a "Grudge Match" all night, but was really far from. We may have hated each other on the track, but skating off between jams I felt a love tap or two from Sugar &Slice. We only got angry because we were both playing so well, but at the end of the night it's all love. I'm not sure if it's a phenomenon that only happens in female sports, but it's an fanstastic thing to be apart of.

This Saturday is our Malice In Derbyland bout against the Des Moines Derby Dames in their very first bout ever. It's kind of like the cycle of derby life, I'll go into it with fond memories of our first bout, but ready to crush some Dames..

-L4D

The 2010 Season Begins.

    Almost exactly a year ago I joined the Old Capitol City Roller Girls team in Iowa City, and 2009 with them was quite a year. Since then we have tripled size, went through a change of ownership, gained experience, and worked out most of the kinks of putting on a home bout. Last year was full of trial and error and I am feeling good about this new season and looking forward to really pushing myself as a skater. I would like to use my experience with derby as subject matter for my BFA project for my final year in college as well. This blog will hopefully bring the two together cohesively and may go through a few changes as I figure out exactly the route this project will take.

    To kick off the season we participated in the Four Rollers of the Apocalypse, a mixer hosted by the lovely Quad City Rollers. There were over 70 skaters participating from our team, QCR, Chicago Outfit, Muddy River Nightmares, Rockford Rage, Stateline Roller Derby Divas, and the Mad Rollin' Dolls. Everyone was split into four teams: Dames of Death (green), Women of War (red), Femmes of Famine (black) and the Queens of Conquest (white). The night was made up of three bouts, two half our bouts which decided the final two teams for a full length bout. 
    Round one, the Queens went up against the Femmes and won 70-35. I was a Dame of Death and we lost against the Women of War by ONE point (48-47). We had a slow start but Sweet Mary Pain skated her spunky little heart out to try and win it at the last minute, so it was a good fight. I wasn't feeling quite up to par, so when I about gave up mentally on jamming, I scored us four points. I was having a hard time getting past Gaygan, so I decided I needed to work hard on my endurance and agility to find holes and get through the pack quickly this season. As this pictures proves, I did get around her eventually..

    This put the Queens of Conquest against the Women of War for a pretty brutal final bout. It was fun to see our own girls mixed up and pitted against each other. Bat'R Up was rutheless against GLADi8HER, who took quite a beating in that last hour. The final score was the Queens on top with 105-84 (I think.. I need to double check).

   It was an awesome night, and we got to meet a bunch of awesome teams, and scour their merch tables, (Team Unicorn was a popular buy from our team, the name of Madison's travel team). Not to mention my sister, Sarah, and video inspiration John Pemble made the trek from Des Moines to see me play for the first time. This should become an annual thing so if you missed it this time around, be prepared to attend next year's apocalypse.

-Left4Deadwards